When people stop switching to English: A Dutch language milestone

*Takes a deep breath of cold January air and exhales.* Ahhhhh, smell that? It smells like new goals and fresh ambition as we head into the new year! January truly has a way of motivating people, especially when it comes to language. “This year, I’ll get to B1 level,” is a resolution I’ve heard (and made) in the past.

But what this often means is: this year, I’ll feel more comfortable speaking Dutch and, who knows, maybe in turn, Dutch people will stop answering me in English! Or it could just mean you want to get a language certificate to work in a particular industry here… whatever floats your boat!

Either way, learning Dutch here has slowly taught me something far more freeing… You don’t need to sound Dutch to communicate in Dutch, and you certainly don’t need to sound perfect to belong. With the right language school, some effort outside the classroom, the right friends and colleagues to cheer you on, and embracing your native accent peeking through every once in a while, your confidence will skyrocket. Time to manifest it this year!

It's not a performance, it’s communication 

For a long time, my biggest obstacle wasn’t vocabulary or perfecting my grammar; it was the fear of how I sounded. I caught myself hesitating before speaking, replaying sentences in my head, and staying quiet when I wasn’t sure of my pronunciation. But the irony of it all was that I understood far more Dutch than I dared to use. Can you relate?

For me, the pressure to sound fluid in my words and fluent in my accent turned every conversation into a performance, instead of what it actually was: a simple moment of communication.

Something shifted when I stopped aiming to sound less American and more Dutch. I started aiming to be understood, rather than trying to perfect my “U” so it doesn’t sound so much like “oooo”, or the “Rs” to have a bit more of a roll than my muscle memory is used to. Although it’s often as simple as a slight change in mouth movement, it was taking up too much time and space in my mind and ultimately blocking me from reaching my goals.

Once this shift in focus occurred, something unexpected happened… people stopped switching to English as quickly! Not always, but enough to notice. 

Your confidence will start building

Let me tell you, that moment when someone continues in Dutch without checking your comfort level feels like QUITE a milestone. It doesn’t mean your Dutch is perfect, but it means you're being understood. It means it’s working! En zo simpel is het…

The Netherlands is full of accents: regional ones, city ones, old-school ones, Gen-Z ones, so what’s wrong with some international ones? Sounding Dutch isn’t the entry requirement; participating is.

Once I accepted that my Dutch would always sound like my Dutch, I felt more at ease using it, and the response was great. Dutch people would continue speaking in Dutch back to me.

And a little accent error here and there introduced great conversation topics and, dare I say, some COMPLIMENTS… from Dutch people… shocking, I know. But jokes aside, it helped me build more connections. I’ll finish this cheesy spiel by just saying: embrace your accent! It makes you charming. 

The trick is: Ego war

Another thing that helped, and this might sound counterintuitive, was developing a bit of an ego. Or, if that doesn’t come naturally, allow the Dutch character inside you to have one. Hey, you can even give him/her/them a name to help take you out of your own reality! Hesitation and excessive politeness don’t land particularly well in this country, but decisiveness does!

Even when my grammar wasn’t perfect, or when I would throw in some English vocab between a Dutch sentence (which I still do!), speaking with conviction worked far more than trailing off, unsure of myself. In my opinion, the Dutch respond well to people who sound like they know what they want, so my fellow expats… BE ASSERTIVE! 

Practise what you want to say beforehand. Write it down in your notes page and read it out loud, if you have to. Take up space in the room, and THAT will get you the Dutch conversation you’ve been longing for!

Your hard work doesn’t go unnoticed!

Learning Dutch isn’t about erasing your accent or reaching some imaginary finish line; it’s about showing up, speaking up, and giving yourself the time and space to grow. So, as you step into this new year, don’t aim to sound Dutch, aim to use it! The rest will follow!