When cultural differences in the workplace can create stress

Moving to the Netherlands for work often starts on a high note. You arrive with energy, curiosity and a clear focus: your job. The environment feels international, efficient, open, and, honestly, cultural differences are the last thing on your mind.

Meetings are direct, colleagues speak their minds, and things seem refreshingly straightforward. And that works. It really does, as long as things stay relatively stable and there's space to breathe and reflect.

But in a fast environment, with pressure building and expectations rising, something shifts. You become less able to interpret subtle differences in communication because you're so focused on just getting things done. And that's where things start to feel personal.

Instead of thinking, “This might just be a different way of working or communicating”, you think, “This is about me”. You start second-guessing yourself, reading into things, and reacting much more than you intended.

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It goes way beyond "Dutch directness"

So, what's actually going on? More often than not, it's cultural. And it goes way beyond the obvious.

Expat professionals in the Netherlands quickly learn the shorthand: the Dutch are direct. Candid feedback, shared opinions, meetings that start on the dot and get straight to the point. But here's an important nuance that often gets missed: Dutch directness is mostly aimed at the work, the task, the idea, the proposal. It's rarely intended as a comment on you as a person.

Knowing that distinction doesn't just help you receive feedback better; it helps you understand where the boundaries actually are. But even with that knowledge, cultural differences in an international workplace are so much more layered than any single phrase can capture.

It lives in how silence is used, in what counts as respectful or professional, in the pace of a conversation, in what goes completely unsaid. And you know what? This is the part I love most about this. Because everyone is navigating this, including the people around you. Including the Dutch colleagues who may be just as puzzled by your style as you occasionally are by theirs. Nobody is doing it wrong. Everyone is doing it differently.

Decoding everyday situations that get lost in translation

A team leader gives direct feedback after a presentation: "I think the structure needs rethinking. Let's go back to basics." For the team leader, this is engagement, and it means: I care about this, let's make it great. For a colleague who grew up in a culture where critical feedback is given privately, one-to-one, this feels like a public dismissal. Nobody meant harm. But under pressure, without the cultural context, trust erodes quietly, and it shows up in how that person contributes next time.

Or picture someone joining a new team for the first time. They come from a culture where meetings begin with conversation and genuine human connection before the agenda kicks in. But in the Netherlands, the straight-to-business approach here feels cold or unwelcoming and can be confusing. You think: if I want to get to know my colleagues, am I then disturbing them, or is it okay? The team members think, “let’s be efficient and respectful of everyone's time”. Both come from a genuinely good place. Neither approach is wrong. But the distance between them grows. 

One more common scenario. Stretched and under pressure, a senior stakeholder goes very quiet after you present your thinking. In another cultural context, silence might signal respect or careful consideration. Here, you're not sure. And in the absence of certainty, your mind fills the gap with the most personal explanation available. None of these moments are actually personal. But under pressure, they all feel like they are.

Three small shifts that make a real difference

You don't need a cultural theory masterclass to navigate this better. Even small shifts make a real difference, especially when you're already stretched.

Pause before you interpret

When something lands badly, pause and ask yourself: could this be cultural context rather than personal intent? That one question creates just enough space to respond rather than react.

Separate behaviour from intention

Directness, silence, pushback… these often say more about someone's cultural style than about how they feel about you or your work. Context changes everything, even when it doesn't feel like it.

Make things explicit

If something is unclear, it is okay to ask, "What does this mean?" Clarity reduces guesswork and assumptions, and guesswork is where most misunderstandings start.

No culture is more right than another. They're just different.

This is what I feel most strongly about. There is no right culture and no wrong culture. I truly believe that. There is just yours, shaped by everything that formed you. And there is theirs.

And under pressure, when differences feel most disruptive, that's actually when understanding them matters most. When you develop that awareness, even in the most demanding seasons, you become more grounded. Less reactive. More able to show up as the professional you actually are, rather than from the stress of the moment. And the people around you feel that. Because how you hold yourself under pressure shapes how they move through it, too.