Being positive all the time is for idiots

We all know this one person that is always happy… or do we? Because no one can be happy and positive all the time. It is impossible for a human body to not be doing anything else than feeling emotionally positive. Ligia Koijen Ramos from in2motivation, an Amsterdam-based personal and professional development company, shows us the difference between being positive and being optimistic.

More and more, we are seeing opposition to “positive culture”. Because it is not realistic, honest or even possible; and also, because it creates this enormous expectation that is, of course, far removed from reality. Many people feel miserable because they believe that everyone else is happy and positive and it seems like they are not able to do the same.

The truth

Let me tell you the truth. Every minute, we experience more than 100 emotions in our body, and while it is impossible to track them all, we can be sure that not all of them are connected with being positive.

Being positive is almost an extra-naïve way of avoiding reality. It means getting away from dealing with whatever is happening in our lives. Being optimistic, on the other hand, can really provide a better life and is much more realistic.

What is an optimist?

An optimist is someone who can see what is going on, who has a high level of awareness and can always identify the best solution for a situation. It is someone who always believes that something can be done differently. An optimistic person has a high ability to be flexible and adapt to situations and can recognise when a situation needs to be changed to make it a success for everyone.

An optimistic person accepts that every emotion is ok and important. They will get angry if that is the emotion that is needed to promote something better for them or their environment.

An optimistic person also believes that the future is made today and they don’t wait until the moment is there. And optimists tend to create the moment and situations that better serve others and their own lives. An optimistic person tends to be very good at influencing people with their optimism, while a positive person tends to be very annoying to others.

Being an optimist means seeing the good, the bad and all the rest and still being able to focus on what needs to be done to get the best out of each situation.

How to become an even more optimistic person

Here is how you can become even more of an optimistic person:

• Create more than five different meanings for each situation that affects you;
• Celebrate the positive and the negative in your life;
• Believe that there is always space for improvement;
• Focus on what you want and not what you need;
• Always be open to learning;
• See life as an opportunity.

The world needs optimists, just like you.

Ligia Koijen Ramos is a life coach and motivational speaker at In2motivation, offering personal and professional training courses to optimise individual and group motivation and performance. Follow In2motivation on Facebook to find out about future events!