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Invader Stu: Even more warning signs of becoming Dutch
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Stuart B
An accident prone Englishman living in Holland since 2001. Still not great with the language but finds stampot lekker.Read more

Invader Stu: Even more warning signs of becoming Dutch

Jul 7, 2014

Have you been living in Holland for a while? Do you think you might be becoming Dutch or do you think you might actually be Dutch? Here are a few more warning signs to look out for:

› You’ve unintentionally freaked out your non-European friends by automatically kissing them on the cheek three times when saying hello.

› You’ve also experienced that confusing moment when you give your European, non-Dutch friends the incorrect number of cheek kisses.

› You’ve realised that when queuing in Holland there are no rules, only survivors.

› The locks on your bicycle are more valuable than the bike itself.

› But you’ve still had your bicycle stolen.

› You’ve finally accepted that the word gezellig will never be properly translated into your own language.

› You've been brave enough to try the extra sour Dutch drop and can eat them without pulling a face.

› You own a pair of fluffy clog slippers purely to be ironic.

› You’ve used a bakfiets to transport beer.

› You know what a bakfiets is.

› You’ve started using Dutch-isms when speaking your own language.

› You’ve muttered the word "tourists" under your breath in annoyance when walking around Amsterdam.

› You know the difference between a café and a "coffee shop" in the Netherlands

› The Dutch have told you that you’ve been around too long to still be considered an expat, but don’t have an alternative designation for you.
 

Any signs that you are becoming "too" Dutch? Feel free to comment below!
 

Invader Stu is an accident-prone Englishman who has been suffering from Dutch culture shock for the last ten years. Enjoy his stories, more of which can be found on Invading Holland.
 

For more warning signs that you might be becoming Dutch check out Part 1 and Part 2.

By Stuart B