Do you sabotage your career transition?

By Dorota Klop-Sowinska

How many times have you thought about changing your current job or even your whole professional course? Then, how come you get stuck when it comes to actually changing it?

The "classic" questions

Undeniably the most difficult part is to go for it, even if you have already figured out what your dream career is.

It’s the inner dialogue - the "classic" questions you have been asking yourself again and again:
 Am I sure this is what I really want?
 What if something goes wrong? How will I pay the rent, mortgage etc.?
 Am I too old to change?
› What will my family, friends, colleagues think about me? How will they react?

The "saboteurs"

When it comes to excuses, we can be very creative. Change, and especially when it comes to career transition, can be frightening so a part of you starts to protest and stops you from getting where you want to be. Let’s call this part of you the "saboteur."

Saboteurs can be pretty powerful if you hand over control of your life to them. They are constantly busy with inventing reasons not to change, not to take the risk, and the worst part is that they are pretty convincing too! No wonder we tend to listen to them most of the time...

Why it is a problem?

Why is it bad when your saboteur takes over? Because, you will:
 "play safe," even if you consciously don't want to
 not achieve great things or even what you really deserve
 never change your average job for one you want and were made for
 wake up one day and ask yourself: "what have I done with my life?"

And believe me for a saboteur there is never a right moment to start with a change. For them CHANGE = DANGER.

How to control your saboteur

So what can you do to control your saboteur in order to make your career transition, or any other crucial change in your life?

 Name the saboteur

First, take a pen and paper and give a name to your saboteur (Mrs. or Mr. Perfect / Critic / Pleaser etc.).

 Put the quotes on paper

Then write down the most common quotes from your saboteur. Think about who has taught you these quotes: your parents, teachers, friends?

Apparently, they wanted to protect you when you were a child but now you are a grown woman or man and can take care of yourself.

 Answer the questions

- What is the main fear that the saboteur is trying to save you from?
- Is it lack of money, reputation or something else?
- How realistic are these fears? What is the worst-case scenario?
- How could you deal with it?

Now look again at the statements of your saboteur. Do they seem less scary now?

The choice is yours

The most important thing to remember is that you have a choice: you can listen to the saboteur or you could listen to the other parts of yourself, like Ms. Courage or Mr. Self-confidence.

Are you as open to listening to them as to the saboteur’s voice?

Realise that YOU and only you are in charge of your life. You are the one that makes the final decision. Once you realise that, it will have a profound effect on your life and the choices you make.

How will this change your life?

In numerous ways:
 You will gain more control over your life
 You will be able to do the things you always wanted to
 You will do the job that you love
 You will become happier
 You will share your happiness with others

So, why don’t you give it a go? Write down the first thing - no matter how small - you are going to do TODAY to change your job / career. Already feeling more confident?


Dorota Klop-Sowinska
Official Member of Forbes Coaches Council. I specialize in international career and expat coaching. I am the author of the book Career Jump! How to Successfully Change Your Professional Path (www.careerjump.nl). I am a certified coach/counselor at the Dutch Academy for Psychotherapy. I have been living in the Netherlands for more than 18 years. During the past 18 years, I have experienced and enjoyed an expat life from all possible angles. I was a woman with a busy international career living in the Netherlands with my Dutch husband. I was a mother experiencing the motherhood in the Netherlands when my daughters were born. I was an expat wife enjoying life in Mexico, where I have followed my husband's career. I was an expat woman starting my own business in Brazil. Now I am an entrepreneur who is running her successful coaching business in the Netherlands. Thanks to all those roles I can easily connect and fully understand both women and men who are living abroad for various reasons or going through big changes in their lives. I have been there, I have seen it, I have done it!Read more

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