Invader Stu: Warning signs that you are becoming Dutch - Part 2

Have you been living in Holland for a while? Do you think you might be becoming Dutch or do you think you might actually be Dutch? Here are a few more warning signs to look out for:

 You are familiar with and have used the two tone sigh.

 You enthusiastically over extend the word Goedaaaaaaaaaa until you’ve figured out what time of day it is and whether you should end with morgen, middag or avond.

 You consider ice cream toppings on bread a healthy breakfast.

 You have a calendar hanging in the toilet which contains the birthdays of all your friends and family.

 Your throat no longer hurts when you try to pronounce any Dutch words containing the letter "G."

 You regularly use the word "so" to communicate a wide variety of thoughts and emotions, without feeling the need to put it into a full sentence.

 You no longer pause to consider what a frikandel is made of before eating it.

 You know what a kroket is, and know to avoid the orange ones.

 You’ve started making your own sandwiches to take to the office (but often eat them on the train).

 The Albert Heijn layout has started to makes sense.

 You have used your bicycle to transport one or more of the following: an item of furniture, a mattress, a suit case, a crate of beer, another bicycle, newly purchased electrical equipment, the weekly shopping or other large objects.

 You consider 15 degrees warm and will happily have a barbecue under such conditions.

 When you speak Dutch the Dutch actually reply in Dutch.

 You are no longer impressed by windmills.

 You are aware that it is "The Netherlands" and not "Holland."

 You no longer freak out and start to panic in front of your friends when the emergence alarms are tested at the start of the month.

 You are able to eat more than two oliebollen in a day.

 You own, have owned or know someone who owns a caravan.

 You’ve started using strange sign language to indicate when something is lekker.

 You never lose hope about the Elfstedentocht.

For more warning signs that you might be becoming Dutch check out Part 1 and Part 3.

Any signs that you are becoming "too" Dutch? Feel free to comment below!

Invader Stu is an accident prone Englishman who has been suffering from Dutch culture shock for the last ten years. Enjoy his stories, more of which can be found on Invading Holland.

Stuart B


Stuart B

An accident prone Englishman living in Holland since 2001. Still not great with the language but finds stampot lekker.

Read more



Leave a comment